Short and sweet this week, as, well, it’s just short and sweet this week. Actually, it’s not at all sweet.

After last week’s warnings that El Niño was gearing up for something big and sinister, it seems the thing has arrived – he coming to your town.

According to scientific types at the US National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, El Niño is now well underway in the tropical Pacific, adding that “conditions developed over the past month, as shown by above-average sea surface temperatures across the central to eastern equatorial Pacific Ocean”.

So, now we wait and see what happens next.

Meanwhile, down in the Antarctic things appear similarly troubling. Temps in the formerly frozen land passed 15C this month, walloping the previous record. But maybe it’s all just a coincidence, eh?

Do you live in London, Essex or Kent? If so, I’ve some bad news. Millions of homes in those areas face the risk of sinking due to, you’ve guessed it, climate change – at least according to interfering, bothersome scientists, who can’t stop sticking their noses into pressing global issues that concern the possible extinction of the human race.

One of those scientists, Anna Harrison, said: “By combining geotechnical information about volume change potential with data about projected rainfall and temperature scenarios for the coming century, we have been able to identify the areas of Great Britain most likely to become susceptible to shrink-swell subsidence.

“Most are in the London area and that’s also where you’re going to see bigger changes in rainfall and temperature. It’s a double whammy.”

Are you following all this? Well, read the next bit…

Off the back of last week’s news that Suffolk County Council’s new Reform regime has plans to dismantle the local authority’s pledges to tackle climate change, Wakefield Council’s fresh Reform leadership have now done the same thing: all the climate change and biodiversity emergency declarations are heading towards the dustbin of history.

The local authority’s new leader, Karl Johnson, who looks like a musician from a particularly poor mid-80s German progressive rock band, gestured that he’s all about “moving away from gesture politics”.

Hurray. Stay cool.